11.29.2009

A little late but...

What I am thankful for:

A job: My well paying job that includes co-workers I like and low stress.

School: Even though I think university is an abusive relationship I can't seem to leave, I am thankful for my education and insight. I am thankful that I don't pay a dime for school because my dad believes in me and my education. I am thankful I have a better chance to succeed. I am thankful for my peers and how my sixteen week relationship with them are simple.

My family: Providing for me. supporting me. and spending time with me.

My love, my Andrew: How he has influenced my life and decisions is beyond my understanding and imagination. I loved him when I shouldn't have and hoped to have him in my life again when there wasn't a chance. Seeing him and talking with him and feeling his touch is what creates the majority of my happiness. I feel blessed to have found love in someone who appreciates me and supports me and for whom I do the same. I am thankful to have him in my life as my best friend and my boyfriend.

My nephew: Have you seen this kid? He is too adorable for words.

Coffee: It gets me through my half hour commute and my nights waiting for Andrew to get off of work.

Knitting and Sewing: My true relaxation.

Hopes of travel: Visiting Erin falls into this hope and plan.

Disneyland Passes: Our small get-a-ways to Disneyland are magical and fun.

Mad Men: (/black friday sales) I bought seasons 1 and 2 for $15 each.

Ashley, Ian, and Orion: The small family I have adopted as part of my family. Ashley and Ian are the couple we hang out and drink with. We simply enjoy one another's company, which is nice when it seems like most everyone wants to go out and spend money. And Orion is basically like my second nephew.

and finally...

Grilled Cheese Sammiches: Which seems to be mostly what I eat these days.




I wish you all a wonderful holiday season that I hope is filled with company and warmth, sweet smells and deliciousness, relaxation and fun.

10.24.2009

back at home.

I officially move back home tomorrow and I will be happy once I am settled in and have my routine down. It will be so nice to be closer to my family and to Andrew again. I am also happy to be home before the holidays. There is so much to do and keep up with that I think I have been driving Andrew a little nuts, but he is wonderful and is always there for me. I'm glad to be down in Chula Vista again closer to my support system.

8.25.2009

wants vs. needs.

i miss my boyfriend. i would like to see him more than just twice or three times a week.

7.01.2009

one day. four days. four shifts. six days.

Karin and I sign our lease tomorrow. I am working an opening shift tomorrow, so I'll be off at 8:45am. I still have a few more boxes to pack to take with me to my apartment. I have a lot to do within the next week.

Tomorrow - 4:30am: Work (Starbucks)
9:00am: Packing
11:00am: Selling my DS
1:00pm: Heading up to Escondido
2:00pm: Signing my lease!
rest of the day: unpack a little and relax.

Saturday - BBQ with my family. Nichole, Wesley, and Jude are coming over. Andrew is coming also, which I'm quite happy about.
I'm not sure what else is planned for the day, but I think i want to venture out to see fireworks.

Sunday - 6:45am: Work (Starbucks)
1:00pm: Officially moving.
7:00pm: Tina's Birthday Celebration.
Spending our first night in the apartment. =)

Monday - I have to come down to C.V. to get a TB test. Andrew has the day off so maybe we can do something fun.

Tuesday - 4:30am: Work (Starbucks)
2:30am: Signing my paperwork for Charter.

Wednesday - I'll have to go back to get my TB test checked. So, back down to C.V.

Thursday - Hopefully, this will be my start date for Charter.

Saturday - My last shift at Starbucks.


Everything is coming together. lovely lovely. Much more in the weeks to come. I will post pictures of the new place!

6.17.2009

Music.

I really want to compile an excellent music collection. Vinyls and CDs alike. I am not accepting suggestions for necessity and donations as well. :)

6.13.2009

pet sitting.

Well, I am pet sitting for my Sister and Wesley this weekend in North Park. I really enjoy North Park and so far things have been going well. I came over to Chole and Wesley's around two yesterday and Andrew met me there. Andrew and I ran some errands and stopped by Trader Joes on the way back to the apartment to pick up things for dinner. I made whole wheat spaghetti pasta with purple asparagus and artichoke hearts. We had mini baguettes with it (which we decided are just bread sticks) and red wine. Everything was really good, although I wish i would have added some butter to the pasta and topped it with parmesan cheese.

Speaking of Andrew, things could not be going any better. We have both said that it feels like he have just finally made up from all those years ago. It is still amazing to me that we missed each other so much for years but it took until now to start again. It's amazing and so is he. Bliss.

Back to the pets...

Henry hasn't been feeling very well yesterday or today. I woke up at six a.m. this morning to the sound of him throwing up on his bed. When I took him on his morning walk, he definitely had issues. He seems to be feeling better now. Winston hasn't eaten since Nichole and Wesley left yesterday. I'm thinking he just doesn't feel comfortable with them gone. He has done this every time I watch over them. Both of the animals have been having staring contests with each other all evening. They both don't seem to enjoy it, so it baffles me why they continue to follow each other around.

Currently, a neighbor is blasting the Rolling Stones. Things are pretty quiet in the apartment and I getting bored. I can't decide what I want to do with all of this alone time. I went clothes shopping earlier thanks to the generosity of Gummy. I ended up getting a dress, skirt, tank top, earrings, and a belt...so far. I plan to go shopping again next week when the stores aren't so crowded and I can look better.



That is the skirt that I got. There is another skirt that I really liked but they didn't have my size. Hopefully, another store will have it.

I am becoming more bored by the minute. Off to find something to do I suppose.

5.07.2009

Little 'uns.

Three out of the four eggs hatched a couple of days ago. Here is a picture of the baby birdies.




5.04.2009

distraction.

1. First thing you wash in the shower?
my left arm.

2. What color is your favorite hoodie?
black.

3. Would you kiss the last person you kissed again?
no thank you.

4. Do you plan outfits?
i definitely do.

5. How are you feeling RIGHT now?
discouraged and confused.

6. Whats the closest thing to you that's red?
the beads on my moccasins.

7. Tell me about the last dream you remember having?
kyle stole my car and made me walk home. effing kyle and your dream dickery (as ty put it).

8. Did you meet anybody new today?
i meet new people on most days.

9. What are you craving right now?
knowledge.

10. Do you floss?
rarely.

11. What comes to mind when I say cabbage?
cornbeef, says the vegetarian.

12. Are you emotional?
i used to be. my emotions are definitely more in check these days.

13. Have you ever counted to 1,000?
probably.

14. Do you bite into your ice cream or just lick it?
lick it.

15. Do you like your hair?
today.

16. Do you like yourself?
yes.

17. Would you go out to eat with George W. Bush?
i've met him before. i don't see a lunch date in the future, but i suppose i would if given the option.

18. What are you listening to right now?
the hills.

19. Were your parents strict?
oh goodness yes.

20. Would you go sky diving?
no.

21. Do you like cottage cheese?
i have never tried it.

22. Have you ever met a celebrity?
a few, yes.

23. Do you rent movies often?
netflix.

24. Is there anything sparkly in the room you're in?
nah.

25. How many countries have you visited?
four.

26. Have you made a prank phone call?
no.

27. Ever been on a train?
yes.

28. Brown or white eggs?
brown.

29.Do you have a cell-phone?
i do.

30. Do you use chap stick?
burt's bees please.

31. Do you own a gun?
no.

32. Can you use chop sticks?
quite well.

33. Who are you going to be with tonight?
all by my lonesome.

34. Are you too forgiving?
most likely.

35. Ever been in love?
yes.

36. What is your best friend(s) doing tomorrow?
i'm going to disneyland with one of them. :)

37. Ever have cream puffs?
no?

38. Last time you cried?
today.

39. What was the last question you asked?
nifty huh?

40. Favorite time of the year?
autumn.

41. Do you have any tattoos?
one. need more.

42. Are you sarcastic?
yes.

43. Have you ever seen The Butterfly Effect?
i have.

44. Ever walked into a wall?
yes. if i'm wearing my glasses it's a good chance that it will happen.

45. Favorite color?
yellow. beer yellow.

46. Have you ever slapped someone?
i have.

47. Is your hair curly?
nope.

48. What was the last CD you bought?
the ting tings.

49. Do looks matter?
yes.

50. Could you ever forgive a cheater?
i really don't think i could.

51. Is your phone bill sky high?
no.

52. Do you like your life right now?
yes and no.

53. Do you sleep with the TV on?
no.

54. Can you handle the truth?
definitely. i so so so prefer it.

55. Do you have good vision?
horrible, God awful vision.

56. Do you hate or dislike more than 3 people
i most likely dislike more than 3 people. i don't hate anyone.

57. How often do you talk on the phone?
shrug. under seven times a week.

58. The last person you held hands with?
i can't remember.

59. What are you wearing?
t-shirt, sweater, jeans, moccasins.

60. What is your favorite animal?
wombat.

61. Where was your profile picture taken at?
somewhere in the house.

62. Can you hula hoop?
the wii fit says i can.

63. Do you have a job?
i do.

64. What was the most recent thing you bought?
green machine.

65. Have you ever crawled through a window?
doggie door. that counts i think.

5.03.2009

i'm curious...

what is the appropriate amount of time to wait before you make a bad decision?

4.25.2009

Ah, nature.

So, this guy has made a nest in our front yard. My dad took this video of the nest and the bird.


video

Hiding Kitteh.

the kitteh is missing. =(

i guess technically the kitteh is just hiding really really well. either way, he needs to be found.

4.20.2009

Deutschland war schön. Coachella was life changing.



Visiting Sylvia and her family in Hamburg was such a lovely trip. We began our journey on Thursday March ninth, at nine a.m., in San Diego. Lay over in Boston. Lay over in London. In Hamburg by five p.m. on Friday the tenth. (sixteen hours of flying plus time change...why hello jet lag). We spent the first day (Saturday the eleventh) touring the city. Covered the majority of it by the end of the afternoon. On sunday, we went to the zoo!




You could hand feed the animals and some of the animals weren't even caged. It was fantasic. We then visited with Sylvia's family. Her mother is originally from India, so she prepared indian food for dinner. YUM! We talked about what each of us had been up to, along with sharing stories, and even talking politics. Also a lovely experience. Her and I were talking on the way back to our hotel and she was saying how comfortable things were and it had been seven years since we had last spoke. I am hoping she can come to the states soon to visit us again. And so, on monday we head to the airport at five a.m. to do our flights again. Hamburg > London > Boston > San Diego. Home by eight p.m. Work the next morning at 4:30 a.m. Hooray jet lag! =/

I was home Tuesday and Wednesday, then off to Indio on Thursday for...

COACHELLA!



I was very anxious about the trip and the company that I would be in. I had a panic attack the night before. Tina and Scotty were my support and I love them so for putting up with my over reaction of concern. The camping turned out to be wonderful. Anthony just ignored me (which was preferable anyways), Nick was polite and said hello, asked how I was doing and introduced his lovely girlfriend, and it took Andrew and I awhile to speak to each other and when we finally did it was very very much small talk (it was pleasant and awkward to talk to him again), and Ian wasn't an issue or weird. Coachella was amazing, as promised. The experience was life-outlook changing. I got to see most of the bands that I intended on seeing and I was exposed to a bunch of new music that I am eager to get into further.



Sir Paul McCartney was a musical experience that I will never forget. I got to see a Beatle! He was worth the money alone. The video I took of him singing hey jude isn't uploading, but hopefully I can figure it out soon.

As for Coachella miracles: I did not get even a hint of a sunburn and I didn't even come close to passing out! Not only am I thankful, I am getting much better at listening to my body and taking care of myself.

Only negative thing in the past two weeks: my side pain has returned and this time it refuses to leave even when I sit down. Time for a CT scan.


Happy happy me. Relaxed me. Going to try my best to keep this feeling.

4.01.2009

Excuse my vocabulary...sucky was the best descriptive word I could come up with.

I have been having a pretty sucky year. (year meaning past twelve months, not 2009 specifically). I have spent the majority of it alone and I think what worries me most is I am too comfortable with it. I am comfortable with the idea of anticipation. I have always had a difficult time making a commitment, to anyone or anything really. I am a very organized and planned person, don't get me wrong...but when it comes to long term things I tend to panic and think that I will be stuck there forever. I am currently reading five books (all fantastically written and captivating) and yet I can't settle on just one. I find myself missing characters from books I've read in the past or craving a new character all together. (has anyone caught the metaphor?) I bore too easily, i suppose. Is that a character flaw? Is it simply a matter of strengthening my patience? I'm getting way off topic. The point of my entry is to explore my thoughts on what I really need.

“What I want is to be needed. What I need is to be indispensable to somebody. Who I need is somebody that will eat up all my free time, my ego, my attention. Somebody addicted to me. A mutual addiction.” - Chuck Palahniuk.

Palahniuk is one of my favorite authors and this quote is quite possibly perfectly structured to express my needs. I never allow anyone to take care of me, I have this undying need to be completely independent and self reliant. But what if nurturing is all I need? What if I just need someone to tell me to just let go? I have felt like something big was going to happen since I was about seventeen. I've been just waiting ever since. I spent three years (17-19) completely tuned out to what was around me and missed everything that was right in front of my face the entire time. And I have spent the past two years trying to make up for all that was lost. Starting over isn't a real thing or even a real idea. I don't want to start over. I don't want to loose any of the memories I made or experiences I have absorbed. Horribly painful or blissfully perfect. I want to feed off of those memories and create something even my fast paced, too-creative-for-it's-own-good mind couldn't have imagined.


You can thank Eternal Sunshine For Spotless Mind for triggering this thought process. If you haven't seen the film, I highly recommend it.

3.29.2009

uggggggh.

day six of my headache. i've taken medication twice (which is a huge deal for me) to help relieve the pain. i also requested an appointment with my doctor for tomorrow. i really just want to not have a headache anymore.

3.25.2009

come pick me up. take me out. steal my records.

oh, ryan adams...how you capture my thoughts exactly.

my short-lived crush on my co-worker was just that, short-lived. my interest in him was triggered by what seemed like flirting on his part. i decided i wasn't turned off to the idea of liking him (which i know, sweet of me right?). however, i didn't want to make any effort. those feelings involved into "okay okay, i like him". unfortunately once i make up my mind about something, i have a really difficult time sitting back and not doing anything. so, i invited the boy co-worker (as he is referenced to by myself/friends in the know) to a couple of outings, which he seemed interested in...but wasn't available. now i have no idea if he was flirting, no idea if i like him, and no idea how to act. on top of all of this boy nonsense, karin and i came to the realization that i am always the one to initiate a relationship. i have never been pursued or even asked out on a date. i feel as though i am, in fact, a catch and deserve to be asked out. now...before i get ahead of myself...i suppose i do get hit on by insanely creepy guys. boy co-worker told me about the regular who has a crush on me. he is in his late twenties/early thirties, asked me my age because he thought i was seventeen, and is married. vomit. to sum up, i am getting tired of being the girl boys like being friends with while secretly having feelings for and always needing to do all of the work.

whew.

okay, moving on.

in much better news, i am going to hamburg next month with my parents. it will only be for a couple of days, but it's germany! i was on edge about it for a few days because technically i'm paying for my plane ticket when i'm living paycheck to paycheck, our trip is during a "no requests off" time at work, and i had already requested the following weekend off for coachella. i spoke to my manager today and all is square. i leave for germany on the ninth and return on the thirteenth. i can work the fourteenth through the sixteenth. then, i leave for indio, california on the sixteenth and return on the twentieth. i will be an extremely tired but happy girl by the end of april.

on the subject of spending money i don't have, i called charter (gag) yesterday to discuss working for them again (gag). they are planning on opening a site in...

wait for it...

wait for it...

SAN MARCOS!

seriously?! how perfect would that be. i could work open shifts at starbucks (fingers crossed i can transfer to one up there because i love my job), get off around nine or ten, work at charter from about ten until three, and then go to school in the evening. i wouldn't have a life again! it would be so amazingly awful and fantastic at the same time. my hopes are way too up. i really don't think i would have any other option though. starbucks pays terribly but i love working there so much i refuse to quit. charter pays wonderfully, but i hate working there. so if i can work both, it will balance right? RIGHT!

i'm so very delirious. i've been up for over twelve hours and have work in ten hours. do the math if you care. i'm painfully sun burnt on one leg (stop picking on me sun). and i'm off to have dinner with melissa and her family. i think mel and i are dating, i'm convinced of it actually.

this post got more and more delusional as i wrote on. enjoy and comment something equally as delusional.



i almost forgot...happy belated pi day. the following is what i made (completely from scratch) for the occasion:

strawberry rhubarb pie.





mini pecan tarlets.

my favorite by far.






I need to keep up with the kitteh better.






3.15.2009

Saying good-bye to my "space"

i deleted my account on myspace today and honestly it was about time. the only reason i held onto it for as long as i did was because melissa didn't have a facebook yet. now that all the necessary people i need to have superficial contact with are on facebook, myspace is now out the window.

now onto more realistic matters.

the get back loretta/silent comedy show last night at the ken club was so very much fun. wesley and i drove together and met up with ty, kyle, montes, and danny. i was happy for wesley that he got to reunite with old friends have wasn't forced into hanging out with his (although extremely cool) little sister. all three bands were completely enjoyable and i got to dance until my little heart was content. i am thrilled when i attend shows with kyle because he is right there with me dancing without a care.

i am really hoping to get back into healthy sleeping habits. as irresponsible as it is to stay out past midnight when i have work at four a.m. the following morning, i haven't yet regretted the time spent. i have been down about my relationships/friendships lately just because i came to the realization that i was friends with mainly couples. i absolutely love my closest friends but i have just been feeling somewhat lonely and seeking out attention and company. (therefore, accepting any opportunity to hang out). i am feeling much better now and am quite thankful for the friends i have. although i don't have anyone in mind, i think i am just ready to have a boyfriend again. i don't do single well and miss being a girlfriend, it would be nice to meet someone whom i could spend time with and talk to.

my thoughts are scattered currently. i blame my headache. more later.

2.24.2009

current excitements.

in order of occurrence.

• the blazer i didn't plan on buying but did.

• sushi tomorrow.

• new music from my co-worker.

• animal collective on thursday
- scotty going to animal collective. (kyle too for that matter.)

• Coachella!
- the bathing suit i knit for coachella. (almost finished)
- the other bathing suit i plan on knitting.
- "pandas can't silence me." t-shirt.
- tie dye.
- tina and i being mischievous. =)

being optimistic and finding the good is always way better than dwelling on what's bad. i invite you to share your current excitements in your life.

2.19.2009

So apparently.

My ex-boyfriends are forgiving me and asking to be friends again, one by one. I don't understand the turn of events/change of heart and it's making me suspcious and overwhelmed. I need a counseling session pronto.

2.03.2009

Come this summer...

i cannot wait for someone to turn the fan on.




Always in my bed.

Well, it took a few days but my dad finally noticed the cat stuck in his emmy. His hiding place was in the middle of my bed...under my fitted sheet.









2.02.2009

factual.

so there has been a "note" floating around facebook where you jot down 25 random facts about yourself and i have thoroughly enjoyed reading them. i thought i would continue the trend on my blog, seeing as how that would be an appropriate place to post such information. i will add things to this post as i think of them from here on out.

[1] every seven years (unless there is a leap year) my birthday falls on thanksgiving.

[2] i have only have one sibling (an older sister who is three years older than me) however when asked how many siblings i have i will always say three and count my brother-in-law and his twin brother.

[3] i was able to whistle to a tune by the age of three. my sister is unable to whistle.

[4] i am a vegetarian and have been for about two years now. i have never liked the taste of meat and therefore do not eat it. being vegetarian has nothing to do with animal rights for me because i believe we were meant to eat meat.

[5] i regret not studying architecture and think about changing my major almost everyday. 

[6] my vision is terrible and without corrected lenses i cannot even see the "E" on the eye chart. 

[7] i used to be painfully shy up until eleventh grade. today, i can't remember what being shy feels like. 

[8] i took german for four years and i am bitter that i cannot speak or understand the language due to a terrible teacher.

[9] i don't try a lot of things because i am afraid i will not be good enough at it. 

[10] i am constantly thinking of other things when i am not speaking. i feel really rude for doing this but i have never been able to slow my thoughts down.

[11] i am extremely jealous and bitter that my sister got all of my parents records, although she asked for the first and fairly.

[12] my favorite color is beer yellow, my favorite number is four, and my favorite animal is a wombat. i have little to no reasoning behind any of these decisions.

[13] i was seventeen when i had my first kiss.

[14] i have visited four countries outside of the U.S., but i have never been to mexico even though i live ten minutes from the border.

[15] i miss hanging out with boys.

[16] it took me a very long time to feel comfortable with my pale complection. i was extremely embarrassed of how pale i was up until a couple years ago. 

[17] it really bothers me when people are mean. i automatically feel the need to stick up for the other person.

[18] i sometimes wish i wasn't as responsible as i am and it amazes me that people can be careless.

[19] it is annoying when i tell people i am a psychology major and they ask that i don't analyze them. 

[20] bare walls make me uncomfortable.

[21] i'm really weird about having people over to my house and i'm hoping that changes when i move into my own place.

[22] i am dyslexic and say things in the wrong order often, especially if i'm tired.

[23] i remember next to nothing from when i dated boyfriend number three and i think it's because i was so depressed that i don't want to remember it.

[24] i was a cutter for nearly three years and only two people knew. i am still angry at them for not telling anyone to help me. 

[25] i feel like my past choices are held against me way too much and really want to be forgiven.

[26] i was extremely upset when my fish damien died five months ago and even more upset when no one really seemed to show sympathy. 

[27] i judge everyone by how they interact with the people around them, not by how they interact with me.

[28] i judge books by their covers and will choose to read something solely because the cover is pretty or unique.

[29] i feel like a better person each time i finish a book.
[29 1/2] i feel a little less intelligent anytime i read chick lit because every main character is frustrating in her decisions.

[30] i am basically a boy when it comes to humor and relationships. i have come to accept it. 

[31] i was told by a professor to consider writing screen-plays as a career after reading my final project.

[32] i have been published and only told scotty, my sister, and wesley because i didn't want anyone to want to read what i wrote.

[33] i rearrange my furniture or bake something when i am feeling down.

[34] i enjoy "old man" alcoholic drinks (rum and coke, jack and coke, gin and tonic, dark dark beer) and do not understand the point of drinking alcohol unless you can taste the alcohol. 

[35] drugs terrify me and make me extremely uncomfortable.

[36] i wish i was inspired at much more convenient times but i always seem to want to make art or try something new when it isn't an option.

[37] i think i would make an excellent wife and mom and joked that i should have been looking for a husband when i was unemployed instead of a job.

[38] i have always wanted  to make a list of things to do before i die but every time i start to think about what i would put on the list i can only come up with "nearly everything."

[39] i can and will fall asleep anywhere and everywhere.

[40] i dream of having two libraries. one full of music. one full of books.

[41] i get my hair cut or dye it myself when i am bored.

[42] when i'm nervous i pick at the seam of my jeans or twist the gold ring i wear on my right hand. 

[43] i had never mourned a relationship after a break up until my last break up. i mourned all my other relationships at that time and it felt really good.

[44] i am a really good gift giver and it bothers me that i am too poor to give gifts these days.
[44 1/2] the best gift i ever gave was a build-a-bear that resembled my boyfriend at the time. i would be really disappointed if he ever got rid of it and fear that he has.

[45] i think my best physical feature is my butt and i'm certainly not afraid to admit it.

[46] i was in choir and sang a lot in school stuff as a kid and secretly wish i could sing in front of people. although if asked to sing, i won't.

[47] i miss attending church but if i were to go again i know i wouldn't like it.

[48] my first memory is from when i was only three or four months old. my mom didn't believe me that i remembered what i did but you can start building a memory at three months old, most just can't remember anything before four or five. 

[49] i wish i were much more intelligent but i'm not sure in what way.

[50] i had a pet turtle that my dad found in our front yard.

[51] i sleep to one side (practically on the edge) of the bed even if i'm sleep alone. it doesn't matter how big or small the bed is.

[52] i love surprises and wish people did them more often.

[53] i once had laryngitis seven times in one year. 

[54] i have nine stitches in my chin from splitting it open on a vhs cassette tape. 

[55] my orthodontist pulled a tooth out on accident, therefore i wasn't numbed at all.

[56] i have a high tolerance of pain.

[57] i have decided to end relationships because i didn't like their family and couldn't imagine being apart of it.

[58] i am paranoid about losing friends because i have lost friendships that meant and still mean the world to me. i am constantly worried my friends will just stop speaking to me. 

[59] i dislike being told what to do and i often want to do the opposite just out of spite. 

[60] if i had a better income, i would travel often. i want to be able to go to the airport and pick the cheapest, soonest to leave flight and spend weekends that way. someday i hope to be able to do this.

[61] i love reading out loud. 

[62] being late makes my stomach hurt. 

[63] up until a few years ago, i was a lucid dreamer.

[64] depressing movies are quite possibly my favorite.

[65] i have one tattoo and i am dying for another one.

[66] i have my ears pierced six times. (three holes in each)

[67] i hate roller coasters but i have been on enough of them to determine this. 

[68] it bothers me when people make up their minds about things before they have tried it themselves.

[69] i feel more confident when i'm wearing heels.

[70] dinosaurs terrify me but i love them.
[70 1/2] this goes for birds also.

[71] i am in love with airports and if the security wasn't so strict, i would hang out in them. 

[72] i do not know how to ride a bike and don't really have a desire to learn.

[73] i have been knitting since i was four or so. i have knit two sweaters (along with many other items).

[74] thought provoking conversations are my addiction and give me a high.

[75] i am dreading the day molly (my dog of 15 years) dies. 

[76] my sister and i look and sound so much alike, we could easily be mistaken for one another and often are.

[77] i have excellent genes and am going to look much younger than i really am my whole life.

[78] i didn't think my sister's wedding was going to be that big of a deal for me, however i cried before the wedding, during the wedding, and during the speeches at the reception.  i'm glad it had a lot of meaning for me after all.

[79] if you knew my three years ago, you would be shocked to hear that i love spending time with my family.

[80] i don't understand why anyone wouldn't like school. i love it.

[81] music is essential.

[82] i played the violin for four years.

[83] my second favorite animal is the bearcat because they are literally the bums of the zoo. their endangerment is loss of habitat.

[84] my handwriting is not up to my standards.

[85] i know my life is boring when karin hasn't called me to tell me "i know what you did." 

[86] i have grown to really enjoy watching football.

[87] i'm not a beach person at all but i couldn't imagine not living near one because that is how i tell direction. 

[88] i miss the time when holding hands with a boy i liked was overwhelmingly exciting. 

[89] my first concert was elton john and i was eleven. i have seen him twice more since then. 

[90] i don't think i will ever go to the wild animal park ever again.

[91] i will answer any personal questions without hesitation.

[92] i dislike being in front of a camera. 

[93] i draw circles on the inside of my forearm or on my thigh with my finger when i can't sleep. 

[94] i'm a lot tougher than i look.

[95] if you ever have a problem with me, just tell me. odds are i am completely unaware of it.

[96] i think girls are crazy and tell my guy friends this constantly. 

[97] my dad is my hero fully and completely.

[98] i want four kids and i would love to have all boys.

[99] it has to be completely dark for me to get a good nights sleep.

[100] there is a small orange stuffed cat that my family and i have been hiding throughout the house for the past five years. 

[101] i was born with the umbilical cord wrapped around my neck.

[102] i am in love with a fictional character. (jim halpert)

[103] i love flowers and plants...but i am incapable of keeping them alive.

[104] my nephew changed my life. 

[105] i bite my nails unless they are painted.

[106] i play solitaire a lot, but i rarely ever win.

[107] i have a thing about volume numbers. the television has to be set on multiples of five and my stereo has to be on multiples of five as well, however seven and seventeen are also acceptable.

[108] i enjoy playing sims when i feel like i don't have control over my own life. that's completely heathly.

[109] i would wear makeup daily if i didn't have to wash my face at night. 

[110] both of my thumbs are double jointed. 

1.03.2009

alphabet.

A
- Age: twenty-one.

- Annoy​ance:​​​​​ boredum.

- Anima​l:​​​​​ wombat.

B
- Beer:​​​​​ guinness.

- Birth​ day: the twenty-third of november.

- Best Frien​ds:​​​​​ three.

- Body Part on oppos​ite sex: torso.

- Best feeli​ng in the world​ : relief.

- Blind​ or Deaf:​​​​​ i am definitely blind.

- Been on stage​?: many many times. i miss it in a way.

- Belie​ve in Magic​: no way.

- Belie​ve in Santa​: he brings me gifts every year.

C
- Candy: baby ruth.

- Color​: beer yellow.

- Choco​late/​​​​​ Vanil​la:​​​​​ vanilla.

- Chine​se/​​​​​ Mexic​an:​​​​​ chinese.

- Cake or pie: pie.

- Chees​e:​​​​​ mmmmmmm.

D
- Day or Night​:​ oh both.

E
- Eyes:​​​ blue...ish.

- Every​ones got a: secret.

- Ever faile​d a class​?: i have sadly. retaking passed with an A.

F
- First​ thoug​hts wakin​g up:​ i need to wash my face.

- Food:​​​​​ vegetarian.

G
- Great​est Fear:​​​​​ not reaching my full potential.

- Goals: so so very many.

- Gum: no thank you.

- Get along​ with your paren​ts?​​​​​:​ oh yes.

- Good luck charm: i don't have one.

- Gulli​ble?​​​​​: not really.

H
- Hair Color​: naturally, brunette. currently: reddish.

- Heigh​t:​ five foot six.

- Happy​: quite.

- Holid​ay:​​​​​ are worth embracing.

- How do you want to die?: go out with a bang.

I
- Ice Cream​: frozen yogurt.

- Instr​ument​ : violin.

J
- Job: barista.

K
- Kids:​​​​​ please.

- Kickb​oxing​ or karat​e:​​​​​ i would like to try kickboxing.

- Keep a journ​al?​​​​​: three.

L
- Longe​st Car Ride:​​​​ up the coast to oregon.

- Love:​ only grows stronger.

- Lette​r:​​​​​ L

- Laugh​ed so hard you cried: it's been awhile.

M
- Milk flavo​r:​​​​​ non fat.

- Movie​s:​​​ closer.

- Motio​n sickn​ess?​​​​​: oh yes. it's a terrible thing.

- McD’s​ or BK: neither.

- Numbe​r of Sibli​ngs:​​​​​ originally, one. now, three. :)

- Numbe​r of Pierc​ings:​​​​​ six.ish.

- Numbe​r:​​​​​ four.

- One wish:​​​​​ adventure.

P
- Perfe​ct Pizza​ : veggies.

Q
- Quote​ : "the first step to controlling your world is to control your culture. to model and demonstrate the kind of world you demand to live in. to write the books. make the music. shoot the films. paint the art."

R
- Reaso​n to cry: laughter.

- Regal​,​ or AMC: amc...i only go to the movies with scotty.

- Roll your tongu​e in a circl​e?​​​​​:​ oh yes. genetics.

- Ring size:​ seven, i think. maybe six.

S
- Song:​​​​​ suicide medicine - rocky votolato.

- Salad​ Dress​ing:​ vinaigrette.

- Skipp​ed schoo​l:​​​​​ many times.

- Slept​ outsi​de:​​​​​ not in a long time...take me camping please.

- Sing well?​​​​​: maybe.

- In the showe​r?​​​​​: sing in the shower? not really. hum.

- Straw​berri​es/​​​​​ Blueb​errie​s:​​​​​ both both.

T
- Time for bed: depends on the day.

- Thund​ersto​rms:​​​​​ love.

U
- Unpre​dicta​ble:​​​​​ usually.

V
-​Vacat​ion spot:​ anywhere.

W
-​Weakn​ess:​​​​​ inspiration.

- Which​ one of your frien​ds acts the most like you?​:​ montes

- Worst​ feeli​ng:​​​​​ knowing you're right without any proof.

- Where​ do we go when we die?: depends on your beliefs.

- Worst​ Weath​er?​​​​​: the deceptive kind.

X
- Ex's: four.​

Y
- Year it is now: two thousand and nine.

- Yello​w:​​​​​ favorite.

Z
- Zoo anima​l:​​​​​ bear cat.

LAST PERSO​N WHO…
1) You went to the mall with?​​​​​ :​ my iPod.

2) You went to dinne​r with?​​​​​: my dad.

3) You talke​d to on the phone​ ?: no clue.

4) Made you laugh​ ?: jermaine and brett.

5) Hugge​d you?​​​​​:​​​​​ montes or danny.

6) Said they loved​ you?: my mom.

7) Held your hand?​​​​​: shrug. jude possibly.

8) Spoke​ with?​​​​​: my mom.